Jokes and funny stories…
by Peter_step_up on November 29, 2006
in students
We were asked to write new entry, so I decided to start “informal” subject, as it is in the title “Jokes and funny stories”
I hope you would write sth ;) , such as good stories found on the Internet or hear at school, etc.
Just relax, feel free and let yourself go!! ;)
e.g. story:
…
During late spring one year, a blonde was trying out her new boat. She was unable to have her boat perform, travel through water, or do any maneuvers whatsoever no matter how hard she tried.
After trying for over three days to make it work properly, she decided to seek help. She putted the boat over to the local marina in hopes that someone there could identify her problem.
Workers determined that everything from the engine to the outdrive was working perfectly on the topside of the boat. So, a puzzled marina employee jumped into the water to check underneath the boat for problems. Because he was laughing so hard, he came up choking on water and gasping for air. Under the boat, still strapped in place securely, was the trailer…
and quick joke:
Q: How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A: Write ‘Please turn over’ on both sides of a piece of paper…
I can’t tell… :P
…A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is
driving down the same road. As they pass each other the woman
leans out the window and yells, “PIG!!”
The man immediately leans out his window and replies, “B…TCH!!”
They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next
corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road…
nice stuff Peter! keep going like this!
=>How do you make blonde laugh on Saturday??
-You tell her a joke on Wednesday
=>How did the blond die drinking milk?
-The cow fell on her
And one real story… I went with my friend to savona but after 5 minutes we decided to go somewhere else… so she came to the door and tried to open it… of course she couldn’t and scared said OH MY GOD WE’VE STUCKED HERE… then I pulled handle and door opened…
I hope that none would feel confused :P
. . .
There is an expedition preparing. One man tries to climb a very high mountain.
And one day morning he takes his backpack and start his walk up to the peak of the mountain. He climbes and on his way he finds a pretty, naked woman. She says:
- Hi, would you like sex with me or would you like to succeed?
- …you are beautiful, but I was preparing too long… I have to make it.
And he continues his trip. And then he meets another naked woman:
- Hi, would you like sex with me or would you like to succeed?
- says women.
- No! I have to succeed! – answered man.
Then, just before reaching the peak, he meets third naked woman and similar siutation:
- Hi, would you like sex with me or would you like to succeed?
- Stop, you devils! I`m not here to have sex. I`m determined to succeed…
Few minutes later he reaches the peak and he finds a really huge, black man, who roared:
- HI !!! – My name is SEED . . .
where have you heard this kind of joke?? I hope not from Bartek…;)
hey you can tell me… it would be our secret:D
…nice one from bash. In direct english it’s senseless, so just imagine how it sounds in polish… :)
…
I’ve invented new mathematical fixed value…
It’s called “ęć” and it’s approximately 1,8584073464102…
I have no idea for whom it could be useful, and what it is for, but it fits in equation, at last :
pi + ęć = 5
…
:)
Good one Peter, I tried to give some English meaning to your joke.
It took just a bit of Google search, math and… :)
1. replace ęć with ve (our new fixed value), and pi with fi [φ] (the English match)
2. assign 3,381966011 to ve
3. let’s do the math, fi + ve = 5 ;)
But is there something like fi, and if so, what is fi’s value? The answer is here